If You Are Waiting for a Clean Break, You Will Never Get it

I should be working right now. I have papers to edit, data to analyze, plantings to plan out. But my body has been just shaking for 6+ weeks, at this point. I’m anxious all the time. I’m angry all the time. I’m grieving futures that I’m never going to see. You probably are too, if you’re reading this.

I wrote a blog post almost a year ago about the concept of a Quest-Based Existence. Our animal brains love a clear problem with a clear solution. Our simple meatbags love an Unimpeachable Good and a Definite Evil. Real life will (almost) never give us that.

I get the feeling, watching people who are also consuming too much news and agonizing about their lost futures, that a lot of us are waiting for a Singular Tipping Point. One step too far, one bad guy too blatantly bigoted, one piece of perfect leftist propaganda, one something that will prompt the majority of Americans to Wake Up and Fight the Good Fight. That’s not coming.

By which I do not mean “there will never be a tipping point, we are Doomed.” I mean “You are not going to get a clean narrative arc and you should stop looking for one.” There is not going to be a Singular Tipping Point, after which we will all agree that working day jobs during a coup isn’t feasible and we should all hit the streets for glorious revolution or whatever. There is not going to be a Hero who emerges and fixes all our problems. Jesus ain’t taking this wheel.

And that sucks to realize, it really does. I love a three act plot as much as anyone. I too daydream about living a life where I am Unimpeachably Good and my sole purpose in life is to fight Bad Guys. Unfortunately, I have laundry to fold and utility bills to pay. Unfortunately, someone has to decide what to make for dinner tonight. Unfortunately, the dog’s nails need to be trimmed.

Many of us are going to need to reframe some things, if we’re going to get through this. In no particular order, here are the reframes I’m working through right now:

• Many small actions are going to be far more effective than One Big Day. Call your stupid senators. Check on your friends and neighbors. Stick some antifascist stickers in bathroom stalls. Add some food to a local community fridge. Tell your boomer relatives how this coup is affecting you, and them, and your communities. I almost said “if everybody does this” but no, that’s a trap in my thinking. We don’t need EVERYBODY to do small actions. We need more people, a few more each day, we do not NEED everybody to beat fascism.

• Every individual person will have their own tipping point. Some of us tipped over well before January 20th, 2025. Some people are just now tipping as they realize their healthcare, their social security, their rights are being taken away before their very eyes. Am I angry at the people who didn’t care until they personally were affected? Yeah, of course. But I’ll bitch about that privately and offer them guidance and support same as anyone else. We take care of us.

• We need to settle in for the long haul. There will be wins, there will be losses. Some days will feel amazing, some days will be a fucking slog. At this point I think a lot of us are used to fucking slogs. We’re getting pretty good at slogging. I’m willing to bet that I can slog on a lot longer than the fucking losers trying to demolish the government. I bet you can too.

• You have to take care of your stupid body and your stupid brain. I don’t want to either, I get it. When I’m depressed it’s hard to find food I want to eat, it’s hard to get out of the house, it’s hard to pull myself out of a doomscroll. But if I’m in this for the long haul, and I am, I gotta eat 3 meals a day and make plans with friends and read real books instead of social media feeds. That’s the only way I’m gonna make it. What do you need to make it for the long haul?